The Black Pebble Arts Foundation arts review committee would like to apologize to our donors. This grant was awarded while we were out. We’re not really even sure who awarded it, but the papers were signed and the grant letter was put in the post before we could do anything about it.

Bill Clinton and a grant proposal for a miniature version of “the Belgium Waffle?” Who knows what this means—as if there was only one belgium waffle in all of existence.

Well at least we’re only down $2. Congratulations, Crash! I can’t wait to see your “Pom Petit” belgium waffle—really, we are overjoyed that you will be making art for Balsa Man.

The Pacific Ocean here in San Francisco is not known for sweltering temperatures; however, that does not mean we do not need ice. Surely, if there was no ice, one’s drink may get lonely with only the glass for company. At Balsa Man, ice is especially useful just in case a participant gets over excitable; you then may find yourself in dire need of ice to cool them down.

For these reasons and more, Balsa Man has approved it’s first vendor: Polar, the one and only location where you can buy precious ice at Balsa Man! All proceeds of ice will be donated to local charitiable organizations.

Polar will be no boring vendor, Veronica Fetzner and Simon Sutherland’s artistic vision using foam core for Polar is excellent and their detailed postcard encapsulates why the Black Pebble Arts Foundation has chosen to award them a tiny art grant of $15 so they can buy baggies. This is a large grant by the BPAF standards, but we feel it’s justified due to the importance of having ice available at Balsa Man.

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Congratualations Veronica & Simon!

This Tiny Art Grant Proposal did not pass our review the first time around. While the teardrop trailer is cute and noticably smaller than an RV it is nowhere near 1/16th scale. Then it became lunchtime and our ability to withstand the tempting nature of the “Nom Nom Tasty Tacos!” went out the window.

Ultimately we were really won over by the arguement that the 1/16th Indian Tacos while not necessarily to scale physically are conceptually to scale as the chef themself is 1/16th Indian.

Congratulations Courtney and Roy, which ever one of you is 1/16th Indian has been awarded $5 for the purchase of Bisquick to make frybread!

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All additional Tiny Art Grant awards will have to wait until after the BPAF tiny art grant review committee has had lunch.

At first the BPAF review committee had no idea what to make of this art grant proposal. It caused quite an uproar—seriously it took two hours to calm down Sunshine, who kept yelling about how “PETA would never stand for this.”

Another reviewer started furiously digging through our bylaws to see if animals are even allowed at Balsa Man. To top it all of, Randy Razorwire started shouting “it’s obviously an ad! We can’t give this capitalist stooge a single red cent.”

Then after Sunshine took a Xanax and Razorwire took a smoke break, then somebody, finally somebody, had the foresight to turn the postcard over…

“Oh.” was the only word said for about five minutes.

A sandwich on wheels with a firecracker shoved in it. Now that is a piece of art the BPAF can stand behind. That is art that makes sense.

Razorwire was still against it because what he felt was an “obvious capitalist attempt to destroy the very heart of Balsa Man,” but the rest of us felt the Roving Hoagie was a great idea totally deserving of a tiny art grant award of $5.

Congratulations Sandwich Girl and the rest of Team Hoagie!